Prince Edward County native Sean Cox is alive and well.

Sean’s parents, Bill and Heather Insley, are still trying to process the wave of emotions that came from planning their son’s funeral — only to find themselves hugging a very much alive Sean at a shelter two days later.

It was not their son who had died in an Ottawa hospital. It was somebody else’s.

Another family, presumably in the Capital region, is mourning a child they did not get to say goodbye to.

THE DREADED PHONE CALL

Heather Insley’s phone rang when she was at work New Year’s Day. Someone from Montfort Hospital was on the line. Ms. Insley had been dreading his call for some time. Her son, Sean, had been living a transient lifestyle in the city, caught in a serious drug addiction. He hadn’t been in direct contact with his parents since prior to the pandemic.

“Knowing our son’s lifestyle and his battle with addiction, I’d been dreading this phone call,” Heather told the Gazette. “He sent us texts once in a while but usually for just one reason.”

The man in hospital, whom Ms. Insely was told was her son, was in grim condition. He had been admitted 72 hours prior after being found by paramedics face-down outside the Ottawa Mission. He was on life support. Heather confirmed Sean’s birthdate to a hospital staff member and was told to come to the hospital immediately.

Distraught, Heather and Bill quietly entered the ICU. A man connected to life-support equipment was covered in thermal blanketing. The name “Sean Cox” was written on a white board. The person lying in the bed had more than a passing resemblance to their son.

“We even looked at his feet and he had the same big toe that Sean has,” Heather explained.

The idea that this was not their son never entered Heather and Bill’s minds.

They have since found out that a hospital staff member thought they recognized the patient from another hospital connected to Montfort, one where Sean Cox went to get medication.

The working theory that this was Sean Cox took root.

The Insleys started to grieve for their son while the man in the hospital bed started to slip away. They took pictures. They hugged his head. Told him he was loved. They made plans for his cremation. They signed off on organ and tissue donations.

“I knew this was the last time I would see my son.”

“Sean” was cremated and Heather announced his passing on social media. A Celebration of Life was planned for January 20th.

Making final plans

On the 16th, Heather’s phone was buzzing. It was a text from an Ottawa number. Someone claiming to be Sean was in need of money. She ignored it. Probably a scam.

Then, two days later, the same number. Same request.

“I said, ‘Bill, you are calling that number back and asking if Sean is there’.”

Bill did. A person that sounded like Sean, although ravaged by the effects of addiction, picked up and started speaking. He answered questions that only Sean would have the answer to.

It was breathtaking.

Sean sent pictures. Heather said her 44-year-old son looked elderly — but it was him. His parents attempted to explain the last 18 days to Sean, that they were planning his memorial in two days.

“That’s really funny, I can’t believe you thought I was dead,” Sean laughed, shock and his addiction diminishing his ability to empathize.

Sean Cox during happier times. (Submitted Photo)

The Insleys got back on the highway to Ottawa. They needed to see their son in person. They needed to tell their story to the authorities.

“The Prince Edward OPP advised us that we needed to go to the Ottawa Police Service and start figuring this all out. The police were absolutely wonderful in all of this.”

The police went with the Insleys to the place where Sean was staying and a tearful embrace with a bewildered Sean, who still didn’t see what the big deal was, followed.

A stroke of luck would help the police identify the deceased. Heather had requested the funeral home take fingerprints and pictures of the man’s hands prior to cremation.

Forensic technicians confirmed the identity of the man within 12 hours. His family was notified. After he had died.

Apologies

In a statement to the Gazette, Director of Communications for Montfort, Martin Sauvé, acknowledged that Hôpital Montfort, the Office of the Chief Coroner of Ontario, Ontario Health and the Ottawa Paramedic Service were informed of the misidentification of a patient admitted to the Intensive Care Unit following transport by the Ottawa Paramedic Service to Montfort’s Emergency Department.

“The safety and well-being of patients and their families are paramount to the hospital and its partners, and all are taking this situation very seriously,” Mr. Sauvé said. “We offer our most sincere condolences to the loved ones of the deceased patient, and offer our apologies to both families involved for the distress caused by this situation.”

A review is being coordinated by Montfort.

The Insley’s are not considering legal action because of the very close resemblance between the deceased and their son. “Sean always said, Mom, they tell me I have a twin at the Mission,” said Ms. Insley. “Now I know what he meant.”

“We don’t want any money or anything like that, but I don’t want them to walk away scot-free and not apologize and not admit they made a mistake,” she said.

The deadly drug poisoning outbreak this month in Belleville has hit especially close to home. She hopes an investigation and review will prevent another case of mistaken identity.

One silver lining is that her son is now seeking treatment for drug addiction.

“We see what’s happening in Belleville and all across the country with overdoses. I don’t want this happening to another family,” said Ms. Insley.

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